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Dark Door

from Carcosa by Archabald

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lyrics

Don't try to carry the weight of the world
It will crush you
Carrying your own heart can be heavy enough
There isn't a dark thought you've had that hasn't been had before
Outside the door last night I saw the darkness creep in, trying to swallow the light.
It looked like a squid covered in ink, I think I saw it creeping in over the door jam, pulling into the room making US feel like boat starting to sink.
I won't let us sink
Not just yet
I'll fight that demon for the both of us
While I've still got strength left on
I get weary from fighting the common mistakes of men. I don't want the mis-steps I take to shake us up again.
Every whim I have is not meant to be acted on
Every night with your body there but you're gone is another night the dark ink got in, I touch you, but there's no one inside the skin. There’s no one inside your skin

When you’re with me there is nothing but a shell
Did the dead give up because of a secret?
Or is it just a dream to think that it’s all for a reason
Because when you cry, you’re crying out where are you God?

God, where the fuck are you?
We are killing ourselves and I wish I could hear You
We're killing each other I thought I was near to You
I thought it was clear that we were what was dear to You
I'm losing her while I'm losing You
What am I supposed to do?
The darkness is heavy, the ink is spreading this feels like an ending. I don't want to be done.

The slow fade harder than the clean cut.

Will you still love me in the famine as when you loved me during the harvest?
Like when we thought we’d won the world
There’s still life within these bones
I’m not ready to give into the fire
I want to dream of a future

My dear,
This is it, the most real it can get. Can you feel it yet? I can feel hope rumbling in the rafters. Can you feel it now?
You think if it feels good it's the devil and if it feels bad it is god. It's all wrong. It's twisted up with both our guts bursting with uncertainty. It's hurting me, I know it hurts you too. I feel it too, I honestly do. I need you. You are the fuel that feeds the fire in me. I miss your smile.

You’re wrong, you’re wrong...you still mean the world to me
But you’re gone, you’re gone every time we start to speak
I know it’s hard sometimes to say what you are worth
And even harder when you’re dealing with the hurt
So save your pride to find some strength to put into your life, your life
Believe me when I tell you I need you

I promise myself I won't kill myself
I swear to God I won’t kill myself

credits

from Carcosa, released July 13, 2018

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Archabald Albuquerque, New Mexico

Archabald is a band based out of Albuquerque, NM

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